Post Election Grief - Privilege for the Win

It’s the Friday morning after the 2024 election, and I am sitting in the quiet with a schedule clear of meetings. I am finally protecting time to work on my business and things that will help me move my life forward, and wondering how just to do so with the results this week clearly in. 



There’s a lot of feelings today: grief, sadness, anger, frustration, and I’m truly scared for the first time ever.



And I’m really, really disappointed in America. I’m also really disappointed in the white women in this nation.

Yes, I’m a white woman. Someone that many people in this country are now going to question whether I’m trustworthy or not because so many people that look like me failed the good of all.



I’m also a little disappointed in myself. For a number of reasons, I have been very silent. I was just sitting here hoping everyone was so fed up and sick of the hate coming from that person they would do the right thing. Wrong.



I was really loving the use of JOY and HOPE in this campaign and thought that it might actually win. 



Absolutely did not. Fear won this election. Lies and jaw-dropping indecency won this election.



In my mind, toxic masculinity has won this election. Racism has won this election. Sexism and misogyny has won this election. Homophobia won this election.



Truly caring for the good of all people has lost this election. I read something on social media today from an account @complexandi: 



“If you think you love freedom, but don’t care if it applies to everyone, what you actually love is priveledge.”



I couldn’t agree more. 



To hear stories in spaces of Black people in our country being given messages that they will be picked up for the cotton plantation is not ok.



To hear stories that people’s lives are in danger is not ok. 



To hear of a Latin family coming home to find a note on their door saying they’ll be evicted on January 6th is not OK. 



But I sure hope you all have lower grocery bills on January 6th.

My own stories this week have included:



• An incredible and accomplished White woman closer to the end of her career that was full of energy and excitement to build her own consultancy. One that I think she will or would have flourished in, say those dreams aren’t realistic any longer as she will have to think about healthcare she feels will only be accessible to working a full time job now that the election has gone as it did. 


• Being in a community of women where one has recently moved away from Florida to a state that protects women more, but has already had an ectopic pregnancy, terrified to try IVF, and feels she can’t ever go back home where her friends are for community if she continues to try to have a baby. 


• Learning from a Black woman that she is going to dumb down her resume, strip it of her Masters, and just get a low level job because she’s tired of fighting to have her spot in tech. 



• A friend asking me to help her with her resume because her job is likely going away when the new administration takes over.



These are real conversations I’ve had just since Tuesday. It’s Friday. This is unacceptable. 



And ya know, I’ve been thinking a lot about that toxic masculinity that won. As a mid-forties professional that has been trying with my entire heart to be successful in corporate America, I’ve been depleted and spent and realized I need to weave in more feminine energy into my world; work and personal. And I’m a white woman that’s depleted by all of this. 

I can’t imagine how tired others must feel.

It seems many women have had this story. And we just enabled younger generations of young women to continue to have these same experiences. 



And around 53%% of white women voted for this. There are pictures and videos of men all over saying they own us women. We would never break the glass ceiling. Laughing…at us. Regardless of how you identify.



And as far as I’m concerned, we are turning backward on any progress women have made to protect privilege. Heaven for bid everyone, every women, every human had freedom, inclusion, and acceptance.

And I haven’t even touched on how much I hurt considering the climate crisis and my absolute love of wild places and wild things. I’m not sure I can even go there because I’m so terrified of losing more. And I can’t help but continue to think if we don’t have a healthy planet, what are we fighting for? 



Oh, to be rich right now with no regard to the people who will live in whatever this world looks like in probably the not too distant future.

I also haven’t mentioned the international issues that are likely to lose more innocent life more quickly. Maybe put us in the US in more danger?



So, I’m here for anyone who is looking for community. I’m here for anyone who is saddened by what’s happened.



I want to bring the people that care together in any way I can to start having more influence on what happens moving forward and creating spaces where we can flourish the right ways. 

I hope this story reaches some people that want to come together.

I hope to be a safe space for anyone who needs it. I hope to be surrounded by more people who are looking for positive community.

I also am not interested in shaming a soul out there for who they voted for and given my upbringing, I kind of get it. But this is how I feel based on the experiences I’ve had in life and the human I’ve grown into. I struggle with how to appropriately love all and be a good ally for those who are likely going to suffer most from this election, but that’s a work in progress.



Hugs and love to you all out there.



I hope that what happened on Tuesday night doesn’t end up as dire as I feel right now, but from what’s transpired over the last almost decade now, I’m not sure it won’t be.



xoxo